Leo is perfectly drunk. He’s warm, but not hot, laughing but not obnoxious, and he’s almost completely sure that the two pizzas he’s managed to eat are going to stay in his stomach, where they belong.
He’s not so sure about the whole walking thing, so he’s going to stay where he is on the couch, and watch Mikey yell at Youtube videos of baby elephants.
April’s head lolls against his shoulder. “Where’s Donnie?” she slurs. “He left a while ago. Should I look for ‘im?” She hiccups and tries to sit up, then slumps back against his side. “Sorry. Tumbled over.”
Leo waves a hand, as a laugh builds up in his chest again. This is the way most major holidays work now: Casey and April smuggle an obscene amount of alcohol into the lair, everyone gets wasted, and once everyone is seeing double, they start sparring.
Without weapons. No one wants a repeat of St. Patrick’s Day, 2016.
So, on this glorious Valentine’s Day, Leo happily handed Casey and Raph’s asses to them, and then both Raph and Donnie disappeared. Casey is sprawled on the floor, snoring, and Leo debates joining him.
But someone really should check where Donnie’s gotten off to, and since he’s the leader, he stands up and lets April flop to the couch with a groan.
He meets Donnie in the entryway of the lair.
"Where’d you go?" he tries to ask, but manages to just say "Werrrrrrdoooo?" before he starts cackling and has to lean against the wall.
"I was getting something for April," Donnie says, with lofty, drunken dignity. "It’s our first Valentine’s Day. She deserves something special.”
Leo forces his eyes open. Donnie’s arms are full of teddy bears, Harry Potter legos, an electric can opener, what looks like a butcher knife, and a set of towels monogrammed with the letters “PRF”.
"Donnie, no," he says. "You stole — all of that?"
"I liberated it,” Donnie corrects him. “For April."
Leo should protest; he should stop this right now. Because Donnie happy and in love is terrifying enough — Leo can’t handle an openly kleptomaniac Donnie on top of all the other paradigm shifts.
But then Raph stomps in, covered in leaves and dirt, swearing about puncture wounds and dragging something behind him, and Leo is too drunk to do anything except watch as Raph drops an entire uprooted rose bush on Casey’s balls.